Go, go, Gadget! Q Branch craziness and how to play at home

Major Boothroyd- The Quartermaster

This blog is about as hi-tech as I get. I haven’t ever downloaded anything more controversial than academic articles about the nature of class in historical archaeology. My idea of multi-purpose appliances is using my phone as a flashlight when I haven’t left the outside light on at night. Our Hero, as you’ll well know, is a master of the gadgets, though. Or, at least my man, Q (short for Quartermaster, kids: learn the lingo) is. Do you remember Q’s gleeful announcement, “It’s called a Ghetto Blaster,” after one of his nameless underlings uses a boom box to fire a rocket at a target? And the cocooning ski jacket he forced poor R to demonstrate for Bond? Or how about Rosa Klebb’s flick-knife shoes complete with poison tip? All of these devices are essential to the Bondverse (the shoes result in Bond’s eventual brainwashing, after all) and are just the campy crap that has us coming back to the cinemas; feeling all fancy ‘cause we used our Sat Nav to get there when we knew the way, anyway.

There have been numerous times where these completely implausible-sounding tools have saved Bond’s bacon. Holly Goodhead’s CIA-issue poison pen stopped a frisky boa constrictor from rendering his play pool full of Bond bitties, for instance. And the technology of Q-Branch watches seems to develop at precisely the rate and with precisely the flashing lights and whistles needed in a particular Bond outing. Strange that, hey? On a less way-out note, it’s the basics like the trusty Walther PPK (and later, the Walther P99) that keep the many-headed hydra that is Bond quipping and sipping his martinis from movie to movie and in fact, in quite a few Bond adventures, you can also hear the James Bond theme being played out in the trading of gun shots (the truck chase in Licence to Kill is a good place to start, if you’re interested).

In Bond’s world, it seems that your clock/radio, DVD-burning computer won’t cut it when it comes to out-cooling the baddie and saving your ass when they decide that feeding you to things with pointy teeth would be fun. Oddjob had a razor-brimmed hat (how did he manage to avoid cutting his head, I always wondered) and L33t karate skillz, but Bond had live wires and electricity. Red Grant had a gun, but Bond had the Q-Branch suitcase. Scaramanga had the outrageously awesome Golden Gun and a tiny Frenchman, while Bond had…a fake third nipple and a basket. Okay, well, while Scaramanga’s got goodies like a laser gun and flying AMC Matador, Bond still manages to own him pretty hard. The good people of Q-Branch must have been frowning into their tea on that occasion and vowing that, someday, somehow, they’d recover from the shame and produce something really super-fantastic. Only to come up with explosive toothpaste later on.

But how do we deck ourselves out in the latest and shiniest in baddie-thwarting gear without our very own Q ambling around the house, you ask? Easy- watch infomercials; those things are full of crazy multi-purpose gadgets. Provided you have a credit card at the ready, you too could score a Dremel tool with 101 attachments and/or steak knives that cut through plaster AND a bonus mandolin for chef-like slicing and dicing. Cutting through steak as if butter and wafer-thin cucumber slices? I think Bond would join you in the air-punching and the “Hell, yeah!”s.

Post-script:Universal Exports has a great gallery of stills featuring the gadgets of the films.

Licenced to trill

In my previous post about the music of James Bond, I briefly touched on the sometimes hysteric speculation that surrounds each new installment’s theme tune and who will record it. Some of the biggest pop acts of all time have been responsible for delighting (or appalling) Bond audiences with their thrilling trilling, including Madonna, Duran Duran and Tom Jones, and it would be fair to say that the use and abuse of the title track is a key part of the overall presentation of a Bond film. This is my list of artists who I think SHOULD have been asked to record a theme and some who still have a chance. David Arnold, take note!

Roxy Music (note Manzanera's famous glasses clutched in his hand)

Roxy Music (with or without Eno; I’m not fussed)
This seminal glam act was at the forefront of avant garde rock when they first came out and over time, became known for their sophistication and front man Bryan Ferry’s intelligent lyrics.
Famous For: ‘Virginia Plain’, ‘Do The Strand’, ‘Avalon’, Phil Manzanera’s glasses.
Which film: ‘For Your Eyes Only’ or ‘Octopussy’ in particular because RM’s slower stuff was great around then, but really any film after ‘Live and Let Die’.
What Their Theme Would Sound Like: ‘Ladytron’ or ‘Bitter-Sweet’ if they were going for drama, ‘More Than This’ or ‘Same Old Scene’ for lyrical brilliance and ballady angst.
Why: Bryan Ferry pretty much IS the James Bond of the music world. Also, the movie franchise desperately needed an injection of sophistication after ‘Moonraker’ and Roxy Music would have been the band to bring it.

ELO

Electric Light Orchestra (ELO)
Usually considered quirky and a bit twee because of their mostly upbeat songs, ELO’s gimmick was their melding of symphony and rock. Fronted by singer/songwriter/guitarist/composer/arranger/producer Jeff Lynne, ELO never managed a #1 song in America (quite crucial for a Bond musical act nowadays) but still hold the record for the most Billboard Hot 100 Top 40 Hits of any band ever.
Famous For: ‘Evil Woman’, ‘Livin’ Thing’, a cover of ‘Roll Over Beethoven’ and ‘Telephone Lines’.
Which film: ‘The Man With The Golden Gun’ because pretty much anything would be an improvement on Lulu and because their symphony ‘Eldorado’ came out then or ‘Moonraker’ because Jeff Lynne is great at ’spacey’ sounds.
What Their Theme Would Sound Like: ‘Strange Magic’ for a slow, radio friendly theme, ‘Nobody’s Child’ off ‘Eldorado’ for sex and drama or ‘Above The Clouds’ and ‘Shangri-La’ from ‘A New World Record’ for something theatrical.
Why: Hiring ELO to do a Bond theme would be like supermarket shopping; everything (lyrics, pop sound, symphonic arrangement and production) in one place e.g. Jeff Lynne, plus he could compose for and score the movie- they let George Martin, after all.

Agnetha, Benny, Bjorn and Anni-Frid

ABBA
A band that needs no introduction, ABBA had an impact on popular music that few acts managed before or since. Fusing great music, catchy lyrics charmingly translated from Swedish (and just a little idiosyncratic) and the owner of one of the most attractive backsides in the world, ABBA are both the second-best selling band of all time and the second-best selling pop act of all time.
Famous For: ‘Dancing Queen’, ‘Mamma Mia’ (the song, stage show and film), ‘Waterloo’, ‘Fernando’, ‘Money, Money, Money’- in short, pretty much anything they ever released- and supposed partner-swapping and bitter rivalries between the women.
Which film: ‘Moonraker’ because they’d gone disco and the lyrics and arranging were improving, ‘For Your Eyes Only’ because their early 80s stuff was musically potent and now mature enough to demand respect or ‘Octopussy’ because they were breaking up and they should have worked on one last masterpiece before the magic died.
What Their Theme Would Sound Like: ‘Voulez-Vous’ or ‘Gimme, Gimme, Gimme’ for dark disco with a symphonic edge, ‘One of Us’ or ‘The Winner Takes It All’ for multi-dimensional arrangement, lyrical genius and awe-inspiring vocals from Agnetha.
Why: Though they were still new to producing sustained pieces of music, Benny and Bjorn would have still been capable of contributing to the scoring. Also, ABBA were the monster act of their day (important for sales) while still mature enough to create something with depth.

Who it’s not too late for:

The almost-Zorin, David Bowie

David Bowie
The ultimate musical chameleon, Bowie easily transcends genre, era and gender and is no stranger to cinema, having starred in films like ‘The Man Who Fell To Earth’, ‘The Hunger’, ‘The Prestige’ and ‘Basquiat’.
Famous For: ‘Changes’, ‘Ashes to Ashes’, ‘Heroes’, Suffragette City’, ‘Under Pressure’ (with Queen) and rocking jodhpurs and a mullet as the Goblin King in ‘Labyrinth’.
Which Film: Any of the 70s (because he was huge and achieving sophisticated chart toppers in numerous genres), any of the 80s (because he was even huger and could have used a decent project between albums), any of the 90s (because he was now a god and still managing to produce fresh, innovative music) and anything from the 00s and to come.
What His Theme Would Sound Like: You could just pick a genre and see what he came up with. He’s dabbled in glam rock, indie rock, industrial, blue-eyed soul and folk and had hits with all. The crooning of later years is more likely than actual singing, however.
Why: Because he’s David Bowie! Also because he was considered (so rumour says) for the part of Max Zorin in ‘A View To A Kill’ and missed out but still deserves a place in Bond history.

The best anti-drugs ad out there- Iggy Pop today.

Iggy Pop
Known as the Godfather of Punk, Iggy Pop has been musically active since the late 60s and his ‘look’ is as famous as his sound. Famous for collaborations with David Bowie as well as his time with seminal garage act The Stooges, Pop has been responsible for inspiring generations of musicians.
Famous For: ‘Real Wild Child’, ‘Candy’, ‘Lust for Life’ and songs such as ‘I Wanna Be Your Dog’ and ‘No Fun’ with The Stooges, also cutting himself with broken glass on-stage and inventing crowd surfing.
Which Film: Anything from ‘Quantum of Solace’ on. Pop was quite popular in the 80s with his mainstream pop rock, but would better suit an intense, chaotic sound a la Jack Black and Alicia Key’s ‘Another Way To Die’ and future Craig films seem to be heading in this direction.
What His Theme Would Sound Like: Nothing he’s ever recorded before. Similar to the Black/Keys or Bono and The Edge/Tina Turner, Pop’s strength would lay in lyric writing and vocals and would do well with another artist to supply the music or mix it; preferably from a different musical background/genre. Perhaps Matt Bellamy of Muse, Mark Ronson or even David Bowie?
Why: Because the franchise would benefit from some ‘hard core’ cred, because Pop has a sound never before captured in a Bond theme and because he’s a living legend.

The other Amy- Aimee Duffy

Duffy
A (saner) colleague of Amy Winehouse, Duffy’s sound is blue-eyed soul with a modern edge. Achieving international success with her debut album ‘Rockferry’, Duffy is one to watch.
Famous For: ‘Mercy’, ‘Warwick Avenue’.
Which Film: Anything from ‘Quantum of Solace’ onwards.
What Her Theme Would Sound Like: ‘Mercy’ for her vocal performance, but ‘Goldfinger’ musically. Duffy definitely has a big enough voice to recapture the electricity of the Shirley Bassey themes and songs like ‘Stepping Stone’ demonstrate perfectly the emotion Duffy is able to convey without excessive vocal acrobatics.
Why: Because she’s more stable than Amy Winehouse, because her sound is reminiscent of ‘the old days’ (and the franchise is prone to cannibalism) and because she’s good to look at (and that was enough for Sheena Easton!).

Once More, With Feeling: The Music of James Bond

Vic Flick- the man responsible for 'the riff'

One of the key elements of presentation for any Bond adventure is music. Not just scoring, though this shouldn’t be disregarded, but the so-called theme song and the use of the classic ‘James Bond Theme’. This is the introductory part for my series on the music of James Bond.

I’m certain I could stake my first-born on the assumption that the Bond theme – I refer to the The John Barry Orchestra’s jazz interpretation of the music by Monty Norman; the music that traditionally accompanies the gun barrel shot – is the most memorable Bond music for pretty much everyone. Of controversial parentage, this comparatively short piece of music vies with the main ‘Star Wars theme’, the 5-note figure from ‘Close Encounters of the Third Kind’ and the ‘Indiana Jones theme’ and maybe the opening bars of ‘Moon River’ for the title of Most Famous Music Ever. It should be noted, too, that 3 out of those 4 tunes are all by the same genius freak of musical nature, John Williams.

Painfully cliched by this point, the Bond theme translates to action, sex and bad puns and has been used as a metonym for such for years. Not to be confused with the ‘007 Theme’; another piece of music originating in the earlier films which was typically used in action/fight scenes, use of ‘The James Bond Theme’ is one of the boxes the producers must tick (along with “My name’s Bond….James Bond” and the gun barrel sequence) for a genuine Bond outing.

Of all the official Bonds (all but 67’s ‘Casino Royale’ and ‘Never Say Never Again’ in short), only ‘Dr. No’ lacks a dedicated lyric theme. Hell, some of the films have two! This doesn’t mean that ‘Dr. No’ is necessarily devoid of memorable music- in fact, there’s a glut of catchy tunes used in the film including Honey Ryder’s brief interpretation of ‘Underneath the Mango Tree’ as she walks from the sea and into cinematic history – it really just means we are saved some of the embarrassment to come with lyrics ranging from the simply banal or irrelevant to out-and-out insane.

Part of the fun of the pre-release media storm that comes with a 007 installment is speculating about just who will be drafted to lend themselves to Bond. With ‘Quantam of Solace’, the guessing game reached fever pitch when ‘those in the know’ announced that bouffant-haired train-wreck Amy Winehouse was being considered for the coveted position. Thankfully, that came to nothing, but Winehouse is only one of a long line of jilted musical acts who missed out on belting one out for Bond (such as Blondie, Alice Cooper and Dionne Warwick).

So whether it be good, bad or “Who will he bang? We shall see,” Bond music is uniform in one regard and that is that it’s memorable. And in cases such as the aforementioned ‘The Man With The Golden Gun’, this is often to a painful degree.

Style Files- May Day from ‘A View To A Kill’

1985’s ‘A View To A Kill’ featured May Day- one of the most underrated Bond characters, but also one of the most stylish.

May Day: m'aidez= (you) come help me

Played by Jamaican-American slasher (singer/actress/model) Grace Jones, May Day was a completely new kind of Bond girl whose appeal lay in her savage beauty and androgynous style. It could be for this reason that there was zero chemistry between her and Bond; Roger Moore Bond a.k.a James Bland doesn’t seem the sort to appreciate a woman who can lift a man above her head.

Hale and hearty doesn't begin to describe her

Q was right when he said she must take a lot of vitamins

Bodily, Grace Jones as May Day is amazing: muscles that look like they’ve been hewn from stone and prominent cheek bones set off by a charming snub nose and round, plump lips. Her clothes, crafted by eminent fashion designer Azzedine Alaἴa, make the most of her unique physique by exaggerating the hard curves with bold tailoring and strategic draping and enhance her skin tones magnificently by combining flashes of bright colour with more subtle shades like black and brown.

Not everyone can work a g-string leotard

A key look for May Day is the soft hood, usually paired with a leather jacket. Pinned to the crown of her head behind fantastic, sculpted hair formations, the hood forms an interesting contrast with the severity of her cheeks and the almost manly breadth of her padded shoulders. The hooded (jersey?) top and bulky leather jackets are typically paired with slim-cut cropped pants, spike heels and bangles. The whole picture has a distinctly 40s edge in terms of silhouette and and cut (e.g. the big shoulders and cowl neck) and is rather on trend this year a la the interpretations of the 40s by Prada, Balmain and Roland Mouret in Fall ‘09 collections.

So very Gucci F/09!

After 5 done May Day style

Purple cowl with matching azure and purple bangles

Note the cut-outs on the sleeves

Not one to be afraid of being inappropriately attired, May Day mixes practical- short, explosion-defying hair, leather (the villain’s uniform)- with unexpected pretty: I found the artfully-moulded hair and fabric drape reminded me a lot of ultra-feminine 40s hair, like the victory rolls or pompadour of a pin-up model. Make-up is as bold and bright as the clothes and usually matches, but even with pink eyeshadow, May Day can still kick your ass hard-core. And even though her clothes are tight and her shoes are high, she can still push a car or subdue a champion race horse.

A new kind of beauty

Can drown British agents without even needing to touch up her makeup!

Lame and cliched Bondian name aside, May Day stands out from her fellow Bond girls for her sharp and serious style that’s still as fierce 24 years on. With her exemplary taste in clothing earning her a 9.5/10 from me, I can only reflect that it’s a pity the producers didn’t let her take care of the theme song too!

May Day has the monopoly on fierce

Continuity, Shmontinuity: “The Other Fella”

Cast (in order of appearance):

George Lazenby

That Scottish bloke

Roger Moore

Pierce Brosnan

Craig the Clueless

Michael G. Wilson

Timothy Dalton

Albert R. 'Cubby' Broccoli

David Hedison

To this author’s considerable knowledge, the only time the matter of Bond’s face, height and voice changing every 2 movies at minimum- probably the most significant of Bond continuity issues- has ever been recognized by the producers is when George Lazenby a.k.a James Bombed; that most unappreciated and underrated of Bonds, turns to the camera at the beginning of ‘On Her Majesty’s’ and says: “This never happened to the other fella.” This is part two in my series on continuity in the Bondverse.

The “other fella” was of course that Scottish bloke who everyone seems to think is the definitive Bond, though I always thought it appropriate that that particular Neanderthal was off elsewhere when real acting skills were called for in that particular Bond outing.

The hydra-like many heads of James Bond aside, it becomes less and less likely over time that the newer Bond actors would be able to fit the chronology of the novels. Would Moore Bond have been able to buy that Bentley in 1933 and keep it safe during the War, or Brosnan Bond marry in 1969? The ‘Casino Royale’ of James Blonde a.k.a Craig the Clueless would have left less audience members scratching their heads in confusion if they realised the plot was written for a Cold War world e.g. pre-Moon Landing, JFK and Paris Hilton. Producer Michael G. Wilson has reluctantly mentioned this little discrepancy in regards to Brosnan Bond, and it seems clear that the later movies, though built around a Fleming core, intend to draw increasingly sparingly on that which has come before for the sake of those stubby little straws the script writers like to clutch at (One word: Quantum). For instance, the last mention of Tracy (Mrs. Bond for all of 4 minutes of screen time) at all came with Dalton’s last movie- ‘Licence to Kill’- when Bond’s wing man Felix Leiter mentions to his bride that Bond was “married once” and it seems certain that this story arc will stay dormant, what with the integrity of the franchise having gone the way of Saint Cubby and probably being buried with him.

Ally wise, Bond’s buddies mostly change in every movie, though some pop back in from time to time; notably the recurring Americans Felix Leiter and Jack Wade. Leiter, however, has apparently got the same strain of plastic surgery-obsessed body dysmorphobia as Bond and all up, we’ve seen 7 Leiters to 6 Bonds – including 2 African-Americans and one who ends up misplacing half a leg – and only one so far has been back for more than one appearance (the eventually-legless David Hedison of ‘Live and Let Die’ and ‘Licence to Kill’, who I love). The large-scale changes to Leiters at least should have been noted; for instance, it’s hard to forget someone losing a leg to a shark, especially when you took such delicious revenge on the baddie for it, though I suppose it wouldn’t be a Bond movie if we weren’t expected to blindly ignore the random changing of race and mobility. The emergence of Jack Wade is particularly interesting, for reasons I’ve expanded on in the previous post on this subject.

To conclude this series, I think it is fair to assume that the producers feel that continuity is for losers and n00bs in the Bondverse. In 1969, George Lazenby clung to (or was draped over) the back catalogue in efforts to prove his legitimacy as Connery’s successor, but his modern-day high-risk equivalent James Blonde (Craig) is fortunate enough to have both bigger budgets and decent biceps on his side to woo audiences; thus the writers eschewing the back catalogue.

The Symphonic James Bond- Sunday, March 30th 2008.

The Melbourne Symphony Orchestra managed to catch my notoriously finicky attention last year with two-concert run of ‘The Symphonic James Bond’- a show that had been doing the international rounds. The idea was not a new one, with orchestral Bondage having been popular and relatively common since the birth of the cinematic franchise. Here’s a run down of my experience of the show (as posted to LiveJournal community agent007 on the day).

Conductor Carl Davis

(photo: Ultimate James Bond Fan Blog)

As part of their MSO Pops concert series, the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra kicked off with a two-concert run of ‘Symphonic James Bond’- assorted Bond themes and suites performed by the MSO with conductor Carl Davis and vocalist Mary Carewe.

Having initially read about the concert through a newspaper advertisement, I hunted down the repertoire to see what would be played and when. Satisfied that it was comprehensive, I walked into the foyer of Hamer Hall annexe of the Melbourne Arts Centre at precisely 1:10 (ten minutes after the ticket office opened) to find a massive queue ahead of me. I’d imagined a smallish group of dedicated (and older male fans) as fellow audience members, yet I clearly underestimated the appeal of music minus explosions and sex to the numerous family groups and gangs of older women. I guess ‘Symphonic James Bond’ was a part of the Pops series for a reason.

As you’ll see from the repertoire, the concert opened with the obvious- Monty Norman’s Bond theme. The atmosphere in the Hall was electric as the orchestra struck up those opening notes and thunderous applause followed the final flourish of Davis’ baton. Contentedly, I sat through ‘From Russia’ and all was well until vocalist Mary Carewe made her entrance. From her first song to her last, I found myself very disappointed by her vocal interpretation of the Bond classics- this is a personal view, however, and does not necessarily mean there was anything much wrong with Carewe’s performance. I did not like her slightly-off timing, though, and found her dancing (read: shimmying and gyrating) and choice of wardrobing very off-putting and extremely distracting in its unsuitability for a woman of Carewe’s situation (as an accompanyist to the main attraction of the orchestra, to my mind). The fact that the location of my seat allowed me the dubious honour of an uninterrupted view down Carewe’s plunging neckline was regrettable.

Judging from the applause, the audience seemed to enjoy Carewe’s renditions of the Bassey themes and other feats of vocal acrobatics the most. Personally, I found ‘For Your Eyes Only’ to be an incredible experience with a live arrangement of strings and ‘Live and Let Die’ was predictably fantastic, with the brass section particularly distinguishing themselves. ‘The Living Daylights’, as the theme of my favourite Bond movie, could not have come soon enough for me and MSO’s rendition perfectly captured the sense of chaos being perfectly handled by the extremely capable Dalton (and the Aston Martin Volante with Dalton at the wheel leading those hapless soldiers on a wild pursuit across the snows of Central Europe!). Even without the charming synths of the a-Ha, ‘The Living Daylights’ as done by the MSO was something I will not forget easily or soon.

I found some inclusions in the repertoire to be questionable- in particular, ‘The World Is Not Enough’ and ‘You Know My Name’ from ‘Casino Royale’. Neither were all that memorable in the scheme of Bond music and the MSO’s ‘You Know My Name’ unfortunately reminded me of a bad school band; too loud and with bad vocal casting. I accept that I seem to be the only person out there who dislikes the Bassey themes and even factoring this in, I still found the inclusion of all three overkill; especially when ‘Tomorrow Never Dies’- a piece of music I find orchestrally pretty special- was left off. I thought that the soul version of ‘Live and Let Die’ that features in the Fillet of Soul club in the aforementioned would have been worth including, possibly at the expense of ‘You Know My Name’ which is not especially suited to symphonic interpretation. And with decisions such as including all three Bassey themes as well as ‘The Look of Love’ from the 1967 ‘Casino Royale’ seeming to be for the benefit of Carewe mostly, I found the the audience should have been treated to renderings of more of the instrumental suites from the Moore movies and maybe even the tender strains of ‘All Time High’ minus vocals. And as ‘A View To A Kill’ was the only theme that made it to #1 on the popular charts, I think the movie should have at least been referenced with the inclusion of one of its suites.

The musicians who I thought distinguished themselves the most were Geoffrey Payne, principal trumpet, whose solo in ‘We Have All The Time In The World’ was very strong and definitely equal to the original by Louis Armstrong. David Jones on drums had perfect jazz cymbals in the James Bond theme and reprise, while Timothy Hook and Evan Pritchard in percussion never missed a beat, despite playing multiple instruments each. Conversely, Janis Cook on piano was the most bored looking person in the Hall, including the man next to me who slept through most of the performance.

In conclusion, unfortunate silver satin dresses and “bourgeois repertoire” (to quote Georgi Koskov of ‘The Living Daylights) aside, I thoroughly enjoyed my afternoon and recommend the experience should a show like ‘Symphonic James Bond’ happen to tour.

a scan of the program

(photo: Permission to Kill)

Continuity, shmontinuity: Octopussy Syndrome

Cast (in order of appearance):
Michael G. Wilson

Albert R. ‘Cubby Broccoli

Harry Saltzman

Maud Adams

Victor Tourjansky

Roger Moore

Lois Maxwell

Joe Don Baker

Martine Beswick

Pedro Armendariz Jr.

Pedro Armendariz

Joaquin Cosio

I have always said that the only foe James Bond has never been able to best is continuity. Indeed, consistency is an enemy that has given the Bond producers more trouble than Blofeld gave the 3 initial Bonds cumulatively and it has become apparent to fans of Bondage like myself that modern-day Bond-maker Michael G. Wilson has been forced to declare an uneasy truce with matters of uniformity; being a lesser man than Saint Cubby (Broccoli) or even Harry Saltzman. This is part one of my look at continuity in the Bondverse.

One of the worst symptoms of the long-running popularity of the Bond series is what I like to call Octopussy Syndrome; named for the second Bond character played by crazy cheekboned Maud Adams in the franchise. It stands to reason that when you’ve been going as long as the James Bond franchise, some things are bound to get muddled like the chronology of the books and films in comparison, but you think the producers would be able to keep it together and wouldn’t have any problems like, oh, who has been who in the Bondverse.

Ostensibly, you’d think that the producers would be hesitant to re-use an actor for obvious reasons; especially one whose initial manifestation happened to have been killed, but the team behind Bond have no such qualms and in fact no compunction whatsoever in failing to even explain these strange resurrections. It’s enough to make a body do a double-take, a la Victor Tourjansky; ‘The Spy Who Loved Me’, ‘Moonraker’ and ‘For Your Eye’s Only’s ‘Man With A Bottle’. Moore Bond can’t exactly say: “Hey, didn’t I sit next to your corpse at a Thai boxing match ten years ago?” when he first meets Octopussy. For one thing, it’s not a double-entendre. He also can’t say: “Didn’t you once organise the kidnapping of your stepdaughter in Italy to demand money from your wealthy husband to give to your criminal lover?” to Moneypenny (Lois Maxwell once played a villain in Moore’s popular 60’s TV show, ‘The Saint’). Joe Don Baker’s first Bond outing was as Brad Whitaker in ‘The Living Daylights’ where ‘he saw his Waterloo’ when Bond contrives to knock a heavy bust of the Duke of Wellington; crushing him. Somehow, Bond is able to forget this (it must have been that mysterious face change he had in the intervening period) and with a one-movie break, Baker is back as CIA liaison Wade and Bond ally.

Because of Octopussy Syndrome, even minor actors like Martine Beswick (a gypsy in ‘From Russia and Paula Caplan in ‘Thunderball’) get the opportunity to expand on earlier appearances and the son of ‘From Russia’s Pedro Armendariz- also called Pedro Armendariz, conveniently- has a walk-on as the corrupt President Lopez of Isthmus (a relevant side-note is that Joaquin Cosio of ‘Quantam of Solace’ looks to be the missing like between the Pedros).

Fortunately, Octopussy Syndrome has petered out over the years as the casting people realised there were more than 25 actors in the world at any given time and God willing, will not return as long as there’s foreign-language film to plunder for villains and eye-candy.